Sunday, March 4, 2012

Epic fail!

So I took and played in a recent 1850 RTT the "worst Eldar list evar" that you guys voted on...And succeeded in coming in dead last. This is the post of my

Since there was an odd number of players, I sadly got a bye for the first game. On one hand, I was in the lead after the first round with 17 points. On the other hand, I got to play the better players and get rofflestomped. Interestingly enough, there were some valuable lessons learned in the games I played regarding Eldar tactics and uses so onto the games! The list I took, incase anyone forgot was:

Yriel, 2X18 Storm Guardians with a flamer, 3X3 Vypers with Bright Lances and all the upgrades.


The missions were all pretty standard book missions with a few twists. Scoring was 17 for major win, 13 for minor win, 11 for a draw if you had 200 more VP than opponent otherwise 8. Bonus points were irrelevant over the course of the tournament (and I didn't get any of them anyways). Also, certain terrain features like forests were "dense" terrain so they completely blocked LOS unless you were actually in the terrain.

-The first mission was Seize Ground with 5 objectives. I didn't get to play this mission due to getting a bye but if I had, it would have been interesting.

-The second mission was Kill Points, get double KP of your opponent and you get a major win, get just more than opponent and you get minor win and then there was a draw for equal KP.

-The third and last mission was objectives with 3 markers to claim, 1 in the middle of the board and 2 30 " from the middle one along the middle.


Game 1:

I'd like to think that this was me in my first game...

Like I said, I got a bye so I got a flat 17 putting me in the lead as the other top scores were a 16 and 13.

Game 2:

This game was against, of all people, my DE playing friend Nick. Well, this was a KP missions and I had 6 KP to his zillion so I thought I had a fair shot. His list had a Homunculi, 3X4 trueborn with blasters in Venoms, 3X5 warrior squads with blaster in Venoms, 2X3 Wrack units in Raiders with shock prow, 3X Ravagers.

Turn 1-2:
Nick's turn 1-2
I decided to keep everything in reserves and then hope to come on and pounce on his stuff for some easy KP so turn 1 and 2 Nick just moved around to be in a defensive position for my arrival.

My turn 2
On my turn 2 I got everything in but 1 Vyper squadron and hid as best as I could behind a "dense" forest.  I positioned my vypers so all could shoot at certain targets but I failed horribly as Nick passed every cover save and I just cringed as I prepared for the oncoming darklance/blaster fest that was about to hit my face.

Turn 3: 

This turn hurt a lot.  Nick was able to take out 2 Vypers in the bottom left along with the Bright Lance on the surviving Vyper. He also destroyed 2 Vypers in the other squadron and immobilized the 3rd. I don't think I passed more than 1 or 2 cover saves if any.  On my turn 3, I managed to destroy a Ravager with the immobilized Vyper and I moved the surviving Vyper more behind terrain to hide and deny the KP. In hindsight, I think it would have been better to completely stay hidden behind the forest and wait for his flat-out saves to wear off and then pounce on him with 9 Bright Lances and hope to do more damage but alas, hindsight is usually pretty ugly...

Turn 4:

This turn hurt even more as Nick moved up to take out the immobilized Vyper and put some wounds on Yriel's squad. I proceeded to roll an 11 on the LD test and roll just high enough to run off the board... Easy 3 KP for Nick and on my turn my last Vyper squadron comes on and destroys a Venom with Trueborn in it who take a casualty from the crash and run. Sofar it is 3 KP for Nick and 2 KP for me (as the Trueborn later regrouped, darn it!).

Turn 5:

Nick moves into position to try and take out the rest of my Vypers and remaining Storm Guardian squad, he glances the heck out of one Vyper in the squadron I moved to the extreme left (I actually passed some cover saves too, huzzah) and unloads as much as he can  on my Storm Guardians and I pass my LD 8 test, yay for going to ground in the wreckage of a Vyper.

Turn 6:

The game goes on, sadly (as it was 2KP for me to 3 KP for Nick and it would have been a minor loss instead of a major loss).  Nick rams my Vyper squadron with a Shock Prow and fails to do anything (darn skimmers not being able to dodge other skimmers) as well as moves up some Wyches that later get out and charge my Vyper squadron. After shooting a bunch at the Vypers from his lances I fail a bunch of cover saves and lose 2 out of 3 Vypers and the Wyches charge and immobilize the last Vyper with Haywire grenades and then proceed destroy it in my following turn with more glancing hits (holofields hilariously almost saved it). Nothing else in my army can do anything so I hide and only lose 1 more KP this turn giving Nick the major win (4 KP to 2KP). Game ends with some bad dice rolling on my part and an actually close game otherwise. If Yriel and his squad would have survived, for example, it would have been 2KP to 2KP and if that last Vyper squadron didn't die, I would have won!
This was me at the end of the game...
One thing I learned is that Brightlances are anything but reliable anti tank on Vypers. Also, that Holofields are not worth it even if it is hilarious to have the opponent roll a 1 and 6 and apply the 1. Open topped kills Vypers. Star Engines, on the other hand, are actually pretty nifty to have and add a lot of utility, it is just such a shame they cost so much.

Game 3:

This was a hilarious and fun game against a friend's IG. He normally runs a pretty cookie cutter list but has lately been just branching off into different things (he took 3 hellhounds and a ton of Chimeras to Throne of Skulls for example and none of that crazy Vendetta/Manticore/Hydra cheese).

His list had something like a company command squad with 3 flamers, a bunch of vets with a good mix of melta/plasma, 1 or 2 stormtrooper units, 2 infantry units with lascannons on foot, 2 Vendettas and a Hellhound. A pretty tame list except for all of those flamers that scared the heck out of my Storm Guardians. I gave him first turn and kept everything in reserves again.

Turn 1-3:

Pretty standard move around and wait for me to come in maneuvering. Nothing of mine came on turn 2 so the action for me started in turn 3. Based on where the hellhound was and the greatest concentration of Chimeras, I decided to come on with as much as possible in the extreme left of the board. My Vypers managed to shake a Chimera and a Vendetta and I got some good run rolls.

Turn 4:
You can see Eric Mc Cheaterpants IG player grinning at my futile attempts to win... =)
This turn Eric just moved up to be able to jump on me with the Vets and Flamers in the Chimeras. His shooting was not that effective as I managed to pass some nice cover saves and also that he moved max distance with his Chimeras to close on my position. In response, I moved a squadron of Vypers to form a wall 1" in front of the Chimeras approaching my Storm Guardians (so he couldn't get past the Vypers since 1" isn't enough to ram worth a darn and thus be unable tank shock/flamer my Storm Guardians). I moved another squadron to the extreme right and used Star Engines to get into the extreme corner and out of LOS as much as possible to be in position to contest the objective on that side of the board. The rest of my army moved up and Yriel stunned a Chimera with flamers in it and my Vypers took out a Vendetta. There was much rejoicing.

Turn 5-?:

Eric moved up and shot my Storm Guardians with his on foot Guard squad for fun, did some wounds and I passed my LD test. The rest of his army shot up my Vyper squadron forming a tissue box wall to protect my Storm Guardians from imminent flamer doom and all but one go down. Interestingly enough, the last Vyper got an immobilized result which was saved from Vectored Engines since it was the last remaining Vyper in the squadron-and Eric (the person who made the list) thought the upgrades would do me no good, in your face! Flamers took out a few Storm Guardians and the Vypers that zoomed to the far right survived his shooting.

On my turn, my storm guardians shot up some Gaurdsmen and charged and because Eric's Sgt. passed his armor save, the guardsmen held in combat. My vypers on the extreme right moved flat out to contest  the objective there, my other Vyper squadron moved flat out and passed all their dangerous terrain tests to contest the middle objectives and Yriel and friends moved up to destroy a Chimera and contest the other objective. The roll to see if the game goes on was a 2 so the game ended with all objectives contested by me resulting in a tie. HUZZAH! A tie against IG with this list should be a win.

What would have happened had the game gone to turn 6:
Eric stands in amazement at the suckfest that was his dice...
We finished the game relatively fast so we decided to do a "what if the game went on" scenario and Eric unloaded 2 Vet units with Plasma guns (all but 1 vet died to plasma overheats), 2 Vet units of Melta guns, 6 Chimeras worth of Multi-lasers and rolled so terribly that one Vyper survived the hail of suck thrown at it. I think we had a pretty darn good laugh about it all. In the meantime, my other Vyper squadron survived another torrent of lascannons/multi-lasers so that there was only 1 left and my Storm Guardians got beat up but still managed to survive the flamer doom. On my turn I simply swapped the beat up Vypers to continue to contest and meandered around the chimera zoo on the only objective I could hope to claim. I rolled another 1 to see if the game "would have gone on" but I conceded that I would have lost everything pretty horribly had the game gone on to turn 7. A pretty hilarious "what if" turn if I do say so myself.

So yeah, my friend Nick ended up in first, Eric ended up in second and some people tied for 3rd and I got dead last. As much of a joke this army was to play, I actually think there was some learning to be had from it all:

*First of all, Star Engines on Vypers give them a ton of mobility and options. Even if you take just a cheap 3 man units with Shiruken Cannon turrets and Star Engines, they become a very viable late game thorn in the flesh to contest objectives and are still easy enough to hide should they get shot up so that only 1 Vyper remains alive.

*Open topped is SUCH a pain. I totally feel for my Dark Eldar playing friends. That +1 on the damage table killed so many Vypers. Even glancing hits made me cringe. I kept comparing Vypers to Hornets in the Imperial Armor II book and was blown away how amazingly superior they are for the points cost...AV11, not open topped, BS 4 and come with Star Engines for free. This is what I would love to see in Vypers.

*Bright Lances are probably one of the worst weapons to put on Vypers. Scatter lasers or bust for me.

*Anti tank and mobile scoring units are essential to Eldar. If your AT or mobility goes away, you are basically in a world of sadness and pain.

*Playing this list was like trying to win an indy 500 race on a segway.

well, I hope you guys enjoyed reading this post/battle reports. Feel free to drop any comments/feedback.


  1. It was quite interesting to see that army in action, Adam. The first turn you came in from reserve and failed to do anything really hurt your chances (along with Yriel running away). Oh well, at least you can say you brought a "Worst of" Eldar list to a tournament :-)

  2. Fun read. I just listened to the 11th Co Podcast with Blackmoor discussing how it is trying to figure out how to build a Vyper/War Walker army. Interesting to see there are some (although minor) merits to fielding 9 Vypers. I have six and have been tempted to add 3 more for fun. Shuriken Cannon/Star Engines all around for epic losses.

    Great attitude to just try something completely off the wall. I've found when playing some very wonky army lists (which I often do), I end up really learning a whole lot about the game mechanics (as my army is not going to help me win any games).

    1. I've actually made a few lists already with 9 war walkers and 9 vypers so Blackmoor is stealing ideas from my head!

      Basically, it involves taking 2X Autarchs, 2 or 3 Fire Dragon units in wave serpents, 2 Dire Avenger units in wave serpents and as many War Walkers/Vypers as you can for some nice S6 spam up to wazoo.... Scatter lasers on everything that can, and underslung cannons for the Vypers.

  3. What?!!! You didn't take this super awesome list I wrote you and ride it to glory? Clearly the failure is yours and not the lists! ;)

    1. I admit, it was total failure on my part. Storm Guardians had all the potential as did the Vypers...I think my problem was not enough Storm Guardians or Vypers! =)